Sunday, 29 March 2009

Advice for the ageing

I feel compelled to offer the following advice - nay - instructions - to those of both sexes of advancing years. In spite of what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together and should be avoided:

1. A nose ring and bifocals

2. Spiked hair and bald spots

3. A pierced tongue and dentures

4. Miniskirts and support hose

5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads

6. Speedos and cellulite

7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar

8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor

9. Pierced nipples that hang below the waist

10. Bikinis and liver spots.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

What does a 70 year-old-woman have between her breasts that a 20 year-old-woman does not?

Her belly button.