There was a time, not so long ago, when being naughty in Scandinavia involved having an extra cup of Ovaltine before retiring to bed at 10 p.m. If you really wanted to push the envelope you nipped over at a pedestrian crossing when the light was red. But, as the man said, that was then, this is now. Nowadays those damn Nordics are burning, looting, murdering, genital mutilating like, well, Africans or Muslims. Despite that country’s impressive social study resources, nobody seems to know what the problem is. Police are perennially ‘perplexed’, politicians ‘concerned’, editorialists ‘baffled’ on the rising tide of moral turpitude.
Speaking of moral turpitude, the following story would chill the blood of even a Christian Brother. In an act of depravity that almost defies belief, a Norwegian woman slowly drowned her one year old child in a bucket of water while her British boyfriend looked on approvingly over Skype. As the Daily Telegraph put it “Norwegian Mother drowns baby while British boyfriend watches online”. Isn’t that something? Guess she wanted to prove she loved him, or maybe he just didn’t like the idea of her having a child by another man.
According to the DT “Police officers flew from Oslo to Britain to question the British man – who has not been named – with the help of Scotland Yard shortly before Christmas. Norwegian police prosecutor Kristin Rusdel told the newspaper, ‘They have the same story, but with some differences.’ Read that sentence again and you start to gain a better understanding as to why the police are always ‘perplexed’ up there.
Apart from its ghastly nature, there was something odd about this crime. You see the name of the Norwegian ‘mother’ was Yasmin Chaudhry, a Pakistani name, certainly not Norwegian. And what all the media referred to as her British boyfriend fled to Pakistan once the crime was uncovered. Why would Wayne, Gary, or whatever his name is, do that? Maybe I'm suspicious, cynical or whatever, but an idea crossed my mind. Maybe the ‘Norwegian’ mother and the ‘British’ lover were in fact Pakistani! After all, killing members of one’s own family is something of a national sport there.
But then I thought, no way. For that to happen multiple media outlets would have had to deliberately fabricated a grotesque misrepresentation of the actual facts of the story. This would have represented such a fundamental betrayal and unconscionable degradation of journalistic principles as to be beyond comprehension.
Nah, professional journalists in conservative British media wouldn’t do that.
Meanwhile those damned Vikings slide further along the road to hell. Maybe some immigrants from a different culture might help?