Monday, 10 August 2009

Ireland's saviour - technology entrepreneurship

Ireland’s economy is going to hell in a handcart as you all know. Our one chance is to rekindle the spirit of the nineties and become an innovative, entrepreneurial, technology-driven powerhouse. We really were all of those things. Seems so long ago.

It’s with great joy therefore that I learned of the following initiative. As a former technology entrepreneur and mentor to a range of technology companies, I can tell a winner when I see one.
The ingenious scheme from Bock the Robber is to… well, I’ll hand you over to the innovator himself.

"Pray Per Click.

The concept is very simple. I’ve set up twin Pray supercomputers in Antarctica, each having three christabytes of main memory and quadruple 98-halohertz praycessors.

For a small donation (let’s say 50 cents), using PrayPal, you can generate a random prayer and have it emailed to an unlimited number of devotional web-grottoes, which I will also set up. You can send it to virtual Lourdes, Medugorje on line, cyber-Fatima or any Knock of your choice
So how will all this work?
Very simple. I’ll be putting a button on the front page that you can click, and using your PrayPal account you can donate 50 cents or a euro. Or a dollar. Or a dinar. Or an e-shekel. I don’t mind.

Then you select a prayer-theme from a simple pop-up menu.
Once you’ve donated to our church-building fund and selected the theme, our two Pray supercooled supercomputers will generate a random and unique prayer which will be broadcast to space in all known languages as well as Java and Cobol, and emailed to the recipient of your choice.
What could be simpler?
Here’s my advice to you. Pray early, pray often "

More comprehensive details of the project can be acquired here.

Now of course, as with all technological breakthroughs, some traditional trades will suffer. Obviously the humble Mass Card, a great little earner for centuries, will be severely impacted. As will the coffers of the not-so-humble Church. But that’s progress guys – don't be Luddites now!


Anonymous said...

I'm reassured - Ireland still has a bright future.

B. Gates

Anonymous said...

Yes - could be the death of the Mass Card industry

patriot said...

Ireland will find a way of blocking corrupt politicians ruining the country. People like Declan Ganley are still out there along with many other expats and one day will make it without having to have an Irish accent.

Anonymous said...

With all talk of our Rathkeeles and the like, try this for spiritual consolation:

Anonymous said...


In mid 2010, Whitman launched a Spanish-language television ad during the World Cup soccer games. One advertisement is quoted by the LA Times, stating that "The Latino kids attending public schools in California today will be tomorrow's doctors, engineers, businessmen and teachers."[51]

(She is really dumb enough to believe this. Worthless New England-Ca hippy. (Channelling Eric Cartman. Isn't it a shame the most in touch guy on television is a cartoon character?))

Please do not let us be technologically saved by Meg Whitman who is saying HP needs to be in the tablet market a couple of months after they have left the tablet market.

Anonymous said...

I always thought Meg Whitman was a man in drag.

Anonymous said...

Brown's opponent in the governor's race, Meg Whitman, told reporters before Walker's ruling she is against same-sex marriage but favors civil unions, according to the Associated Press. The news agency reported Whitman, aBritneySpears , has explained her vote for Proposition 8 as one of "faith and conscience."

"I believe marriage should be between a man and a woman," the AP reported Whitman said at a campaign stop in East Los Angeles.

Anon 00:10 you might be onto something.

Anonymous said...

They go on about slight biases, see comments Thomas Schelling model, leading to larger biases and them finding it wrong but not wrong in the University students who wanted more diversity in the classroom but less on their basketball courts.

(University College Davis I believe.)

Chick's slideshow to show Larry Summer was wrong. Or something.

In this slide is the dudette contradicting herself?

Anonymous said...

Reason a HP CEO was fired

HPused to be the byline in top class printers which started going when Carly "Look at me! Me! Me!" Fiorina came on board and she did enough stuff to be named one of the 20 worst CEOs ever.

The New York Times said Hurd had "pulled off one of the great rescue missions in American corporate history, refocusing the strife-ridden company and leading it to five years of revenue gains and a stock that soared 130 percent

which I guess is part of the reason he was fired so as to have a victory for the Fiorina camp.

Overall HP started stagnating because they got focussed on office politics over making products that were useful.

SAVANT said...

I agree about Fiorina. She got the job because she was a woman. With a surfeit of testosterone. What a disaster.

Anonymous said...

Fiorina also suffered from not having a Roman slave to whisper in her ear.

"You are CEO of a Fortune 500 company well done." she heard so she went around hearing and expecting to hear it all day and forgot about minor little things like being CEO of a Fortune 500 company.

It was reminiscent of The Simpsons episode of Lyle Langley explaining it was like a mule with a spinning wheel danged if she knew how she got it and danged if she could do anything with it.

Britney Spears has been heard to ask why don't you do something? yet no one at HP thought of asking this of her.

Anonymous said...

U.S. Patent No. 8,082,342

Worst patent ever!

Google search of trends on the searches for Martin Luther King for plagiarist day is not allowed to be used by the black man making it racist and Google evul.

Anonymous said...

Was on another site and a sidebar ad was for Brother printers.

Once upon a time I would never have clicked on it to check what they had because the rule of thumb was if you needed a printer you found the HP one which fitted your needs.

Anonymous said...

Samsung sued over emoticon patent and not by Apple!

Got any patents and access to a sleazy lawyer?

Anonymous said...

Some chick has come up with the factb that wimmin make better bosses because they are wimmin.

Meg Whitman and Carly Fiorini proved that didn't they?

Anonymous said...

The great Karlin Lillington (Yo! Spellchecka that is the way this talented lady from Ma spells it) was echoing the Alan Shatter, minister of Justice and Defence, that the technology sector needs to import 1250 technology sector workers a year because tech graduates like JM from Tallaght think a guy called Jef Raskin was involved with the creation of the Mac when everyone in the technology sector in Ireland knows it was poorely Steve Jobs baby.

And that it was wrong of Apple to kick out the guy who was going to bankrupt the company.

SAVANT said...

I actually think we need to import specialist IT skills, based on conversations with people in the industry. This reflects the wasted focus of so much Irish education. History, languages etc. are great. But they can be learned on your own time and shouldn't take up resources from the more productive disciplines.

Anonymous said...

My question on the importing of specilaist IT skills is are they there in the country at the moment but nobody chooses to see because they are from the wrong background.

For example I remember a programme where the bird from eddie Rockets said she could not get properly qualified Irish staff but somehow the propeprly qualified staff were non-native Englsih speakers from China.

An Irish solution to a non-Irish problem I suppose you could ahve called it.

SAVANT said...

ANON 9.50. I'VE SEEN EVIDENCE OFTHAT MYSELF IN THE IT FIELD. (sorry for caps!). Just like in the US it seems employers like docile non-unionised foreign workers.

Anonymous said...

Palm and HP's failure with WebOS

HP used to be run by engineers. we will put WebOS on a printer but nobody was there to say "Do you know what that will do to the price?"

Docile preferred you say?

Anonymous said...

I was at Lucent when Carly was there - I thought she was a waste of space then, and I was shocked when HP hired her. HP was "Bill and Dave's company" - by and for engineers making great products. It was obvious to this outsider Carly was the wrong choice - I had no idea how right I was. A friend in HP Sales confirmed there was dancing in the hallways the day the HP board finally canned Carly. The only good part of HP that is left isn't HP at all - Agilent Technologies is as close as we have to what Bill and Dave started.

HP was an innovative company but the MBAs decided to rid themselves of engineers to engineer a short term profit increase and more bonuses for MBAs which was paid for by the company going off the rails.

Will MBAs learn what went wrong when they do the case study og HP?

Anonymous said...

Carly Fiorina learned how to operate a company under Pat Russo the woman who closed down Bell Labs which was where C, C++, UNIX, Plan 9 and other stuff was created. That did not turn out well either.

Anonymous said...

Karlin Lillington's reaction to the Apple Samsung trial

The Irish Times Technology Section's abbreviation sums it up

SAVANT said...

I've worked in IT all my life and I never met a woman I could look up to. The worst of all were the testosterone-fuelled mini-men like Fiorina. Worse than uselessthe lot of them. And the deeper you went down, e.g. OS kernels or machine languages, the worse they were. Unless they were dykes.

SAVANT said...

Yes, HP, and Digital (DEC) as well, used to be run by engineers. and it showed. Then they brought in, first the accountants, and of that wasn't bad enough, they were followed by the 'marketers', e.g. Fiorina and her ilk. Result, devastation.

Having said that, Hewlett and Packard, and Ken Olsen from DEC, all contributed greatly to their companies' demise by totally underestimating the PC revolution.

Anonymous said...

Carly, Pat and Meg remind me of Maeve Donovan who successfully turned the Irish Times from a well run company to one that shed 10 000 sales and wasted €47 000 000 on
This titanic woman doth stand bestride ye olde newespaper business and the new micturating down on the 'orrible 'orrible plebes.

SAVANT said...

Well, be grateful that she nearly fucked up the Slimes.

Anonymous said...

Check out Blit developed by AT&T.

256K RAM worked a GUI on UNIX® well before Next and OS X.

GUIs were thought of by a lot more people than just hip Californians.

eleos said...

Did you see that VMWare is now one of the most profitable and valuable companies around. Run and operated by engineers.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

Mark Zuckerberg's National Association for the advancemet of Billionaire People has set up two pressure groups to assist the democrats and republicans into seeing that he really needs cheap programmers from overseas to improve thefacebook's profits as monetizing the assets has proved difficult. Maybe he should try to ProsperInIsrael.