Tuesday, 27 February 2007

Check your taxi driver!

The Tennesean says that a disciplinary hearing is set for tomorrow for the Nashville taxi driver accused of trying to run over two students after a heated discussion over religion last week. The hearing for driver Ibrahim Sheikh Ahmed, 37, is on the agenda of the 1:30 p.m. meeting Tuesday of the Metro Transportation Licensing Commission.Ahmed was arrested Feb. 18 on charges of criminal homicide after police said he hit Ohio student Jeremie Invus with his United Cab Co. van. Ahmed is in the Metro Jail awaiting trial.Another student, Andrew Nelson of Dayton, Ohio, dodged the van as it sped toward them.

According to a police report, the three men had a conversation about religion while in the taxi that "became heated." Shortly after the men paid Ahmed, he chased them in his van across the parking lot and over a curb, police said.Metro police spokeswoman Kris Mumford said one of the students is Catholic and the other is Lutheran. Mumford said that Ahmed's religion was not known.Ahmed has had at least two other run-ins with police during the past year, including a high-speed chase through Nashville in his taxi, according to Metro police reports.

Dont you just love the 'we don't know the religion of a Somali called Ibrahim Sheikh Ahmed'? Your Savant thinks he's a Buddhist, but that's just a guess. Again, it shows how the PC Thought Police have closed down any discussion on the Religion of Peace. When we take into account that Somali taxi drivers in Minneapolis won't take passengers carrying drink, or to a pub ot off-locense, my readers better check their driver carefully as we get flooded with similiar beauties here.

Decline of the West

Many observers suggest that the West is slowly but inexorably losing its dominance in the spheres of science, business and culture. When you look at the following can you doubt it?

On Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn
upside down."(well...duh, a bit late!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after
heating." (...and you thought????...)

On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase
Necessary - details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boots Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to
reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those
5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm
taking this because???....)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a
news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open
packet, eat nuts." (Special instructions for GW Bush?)

On a Hskvarna chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your
hands or genitals." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Friday, 23 February 2007

Irish foreign aid

You know, the IT sometimes really does a disservice to its readers. For instance in yesterday’s edition Dr. Rory Miller, of King’s College in London, laments the fact that Ireland provides ‘only’ €21 million a year to Afghanistan. Rory, old son, according to your Savant’s computation, this money would have been precisely 8673% more effective had it been spent on keeping our own inner city youth in our rundown education system, or even on Bertie’s makeup artists or Martin Cullen’s PR team. This is because not only is it useless to give it to Afghanistan, it’s worse than useless.

Now pay attention Rory, and those of you at the back of the class, while your Savant explains why.

Afghanistan has been a violent, backward, tribal, poverty-stricken hell-hole since God wore short pants. A foreign invasion was the only thing that stopped its various tribes from slaughtering and robbing each other. The British invaded three times, and are now on their fourth attempt. All previous adventures ended in disaster, just as the current one will, as surely as night follows day. Pouring vast sums of money into such an environment, accompanied by yet another invasion, makes things worse for a number of reasons.

First, it should be obvious to even to an IT contributor that an infidel army blowing the shite out of the locals may not be the best way to win hearts and minds. Then the money that comes in ends up with warlords and various religious, criminal and tribal groupings, who use it to further their own nefarious ends. Such intrusions are like poking a short stick into a large hornets’ nest.

The solution is to let Darwinian forces apply - let them at it until force of circumstances compels them to arrive at a solution. This could mean warlords reigning, the Taliban resurgent, or whatever. The point is, these malign forces could not gain and hold power without the support of a critical mass of the population. It’s only when the population finally rises up, or evolves into some other form polity, that some semblance of order will be achieved. If they don’t do that, then they deserve what they get.

Thursday, 22 February 2007

God Franchise mega-merger

The Economist isn't often the source of witticism, but certainly the current issue breaks new ground in describing the 'inter-faith dialogue' between Papists and Prods in terms of an international mega-merger - which of course is exactly what it would be. While your Savant has been able to identify the respective market penetration rates, unfortunately we're unable to establish revenue figures or margins. However, given that all profits are tax-free these should be substantial. As we'll see, the management structure of the combined company could pose a problem, especially with the Pope as CEO. However, your Savant believes that if God could be
induced to act as Chairman of the combined entity, this could be overcome. All in all, a good investment.

So here's the analysis:

The prospect of a tie-up between a vast, Rome-based corporation, and a smaller rival with headquarters in southern England, has sent some analysts into a speculative spin. Early discussions are said to have taken place between representatives of two long-established groups. If successful, the deal would see a parent company rejoined with a unit that separated from it, somewhat acrimoniously, in the 16th century.

Some observers suggest that this deal may be at least as significant as the split and subsequent remerger of parts of the AT&T, a telecoms company that held a monopoly position in America until the 1970s. As with AT&T, the break up of a once-dominant organisation inevitably leaves deep scars. But over time, as new competitors with new ideas change the business landscape, the abuse of monopoly power and the pain of parting may be forgotten for the sake of mutual gains. AT&T’s eventual remerger in 2006 with BellSouth, a branch of the telecoms giant snapped off in the reformation of America’s telecoms business, was acknowledged by most as a sensible reaction to the changing competitive landscape.

That may also be true for the two dominant forces in Christian communications. Christianity still claims consumers representing roughly a third of the world’s population. Of these the Catholic brand, with its headquarters in Rome, boasts 1.1 billion adherents. The Anglicans also have global reach, but would bring around 80m adherents to the united corporation. Still, at a time when Christianity is suffering from sluggish growth rates, expansion through mergers seems to be the only means of gaining market share. Traditional worshipping establishments have seen serious competition from Evangelicals and Pentecostalists operating from out-of-town megachurches. Older forms of Christianity, rather like print newspapers, are also losing out as elderly customers fail to be replaced by younger ones and as occasional consumption—rather than traditional, regular use—becomes the norm.

Both churches have sought to downplay talk of a merger. And, evidently, several obstacles remain. As with any merger, knitting together rival management teams could prove tricky. Each disagrees on the nature of the eucharist and the ordination of women. Recognising the pope as the boss of a merged corporation might also prove a sticking point. The Anglican brand also looks troubled. It lacks a clear business model and suffers from open divisions among top managers who have far more devolved authority. Many managers are engaged in a bitter dispute over the hiring of homosexual staff in its American subsidiary. In contrast the Catholic church has a clear line of command between its chief executive, its 4,700 senior executives and 400,000 line managers around the world. Not to mention the ongoing link from its CEO direct to God.

Yet potential synergies abound. Combining workforces could allow for significant cost savings, though job cuts might prove unpopular. Buoyant property markets mean that a merged church could profit handsomely by selling surplus assets, many of them in prime city-centre sites. As the two organisations would not benefit equally—the merger would in effect be a Catholic takeover of its smaller rival—Anglicans may prefer a looser bond, perhaps hiving-off some assets into a joint-venture or even, looking to the heavens, embracing something akin to the code-sharing agreements between big airlines. Whatever form the merger eventually takes, if any, at least the two groups have shown they are serious about getting the mass-communication business in shape for the 21st century.

Wednesday, 21 February 2007

What's up doc?

So farewell then, Dr. John......

Prof. John Murphy resigns as President of the President of the Royal College of Physicians. Presumably with a straight face he claims “I have always endeavoured to act with honesty and integrity in my own professional life as an obstetrician and gynecologist”. John, you have in your bollix. You acted to protect your partners in the medical business at the expense of their victims.
After years of whipping out the wombs of half the unfortunate mothers who fell under his ‘care’, Michael Neary was eventually found grossly negligent and incompetent and struck off the Medical Register. Not before Doc Murphy had the following to say on his behalf: “the mothers of the North Eastern Health Board are fortunate in having the service of such an experienced and caring obstetrician," adding “it is my conclusion that Dr Neary has no case to answer concerning his management of any of the patients in question."

In this he was doing nothing more than what medicos have done all down the years. This group’s arrogance was exemplified by Murphy’s being elected as President of the RCPI even after Neary was struck off. This was giving one big finger to the public in the traditional fashion. However, on this occasion the industry’s main supporter, the Catholic Church, was in no position to see off the public. The two groups have stuck together like shit to a blanket over the years, in a form of toxic collusion to enforce Church dogma on their victims. The most grotesque example of this was the imposition of symphysiotomy, the barbaric practice of sawing through the pelvis, undertaken by doctors to avoid Caesarean births. They feared this could encourage contraceptive practices, ya see. Typical lifelong effects included constant backache, tiredness and incontinence. But what did that matter – the mothers had been saved from sin.

It’s a common view that the Church has lost its power after that debased institution collapsed under the weight of its own corruption. But that's not true. Whereas thankfully the number of young people entering the business has almost dried up, the Church still owns most of the hospitals and schools (despite being paid for by the taxpayer) and holds on to them for dear life – except when it can turn a huge profit by selling to a developer. The systematic downgrading of Tallagh Hospital and the consolidation of childrens’ services in the Mater underline this.

Vigilance still called for!

Sunday, 18 February 2007

Our President's multi-purpose speech

Your Savant has often wondered why, apart from offloading a lot of excess tax revenue, we need a President. Totally powerless in any practical sense, she wanders the world at great expense, talking horseshit to unsuspecting foreigners. Having noted that every speech, no matter where or to whom, regurgitates exactly the same message, we have, in the interests of saving costs, and getting rid of a few dozen of her speech writers, drawn up our own multi-purpose speech. This will apply in any country, from Pakistan to Paraguay, from Canada to Cameroon, and for any occasion. For the purpose of this execrise we have designated the country Bangawandistan.


Dia dhíbh a chairde go léir. Ta go maith agus Bord na Mona.

This is a historic day in my life, and a wonderful privilege for me to represent my country before the proud people of Bangawandistan. We Irish have an extraordinarily deep relationship with the people of Bangawandistan. It embraces many stories of heartache and courage, of heroism and achievement. We are privileged to share with you this very special experience, with its vitality and variety and its huge passion for one another’s culture. Today, we thank God for the gift of being connected, of staying connected, different peoples, but really as one.


Our long-standing relationship immensely enriches both peoples. It entertains and uplifts, inspires and provokes. And why not? The sea/mountains/rivers/lakes [choose as appropriate] between us are a bridge, not a barrier, to peoples who share so much. And what do we share? First, a formidable cultural heritage [Note: not suitable for Australia]. Our two peoples share a love for art, poetry, song, dance and literature. We also share a deep love of sport, where participation, not winning, is all.

More notable still is the world-renowned reputation for hospitality and generosity enjoyed by our countries, where strangers become friends, differences are celebrated and cultural curiosity becomes the bridge to shared citizenship – a citizenship which has always been wide open and all embracing. At our core we are sharing peoples. Selfishness has never been our creed.

Commitment to the welfare of each other has fired generations of voluntary organisations and a network of everyday neighborliness which weaves together the caring fabric of our respective countries and has made them a refuge for the hurt and dispossessed of other troubled places. In both countries, over many generations there have been very special sources of inspiration. Outstanding politicians, public servants, voluntary workers, clergy of all denominations (but especially Catholic), teachers and particularly parents have through hard and difficult times worked and sacrificed so that our children – and our children’s children - could blossom to their fullest potential.

So in many ways I see the people of Bangawandistan as a crucial part of our global Irish family. The differences which separate us fade into insignificance as the bond of our common humanity forges friendships as intense as love can make them. Yet, both countries know only too well the cruelty and capriciousness of violent conflict. Who can forget, for instance, the way those black Protestant bastards ran me out of my home in the Six Counties all these years ago? Yet we also have a store of shared happy memories which are the bastion against distrust and enmity - a considerable store of great memories, of triumphs and disappointments, of courage and commitment, of hopes and ambitions.

Both peoples can therefore look with satisfaction at what they have achieved. (I never stop doing this in relation to myself, which makes me such a smug, preening insufferable bitch). Our aspiration as proud nations is to be truly inclusive societies, comfortable with differences of faith, culture, ethnicity and colour: It is to reveal the heart we have and the wide support in our countries for the creation of a society of respected equals, enriched with open-mindedness and joyful curiosity about the "otherness" of others. These are the traits we encourage in our children. – and in our children's children.

And finally, may the blessing of the Almighty Father, the Blessed Virgin, the Infant de Prague and the Holy Father, Uber-Kolonel Benedikt fall on both our noble peoples.

And in closing, you have no idea how much I appreciate your allowing me to spew out this horseshit to yet another captive audience of stupefied foreigners.




Saturday, 17 February 2007

PC guidelines

The more observant of my readers will have noted that I LOVE policital correctness (PC). Accordingly I provide you with the following invaluable guidelines when referring to the fairer sex.


She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."

She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY ENHANCED."

She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

Now you'll be aware of course that PC doesn't apply to men, but just in case that day every comes (is that a pig I see flying past my window?) the following will be invaluable:

He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."

He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."

He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE "

The mystery connection

The wave of shootings and gun murders in England has obviously attracted widespread attention. We have also had the regulatory hand-wringing and bleatings on ‘who and why?. As always, the mainstream media (MSM) avoid the glaringly obvious. Check out the BBC website for example and you’ll encounter extensive coverage, quotations and explanations from all and sundry. What you won't hear, because you gotta keep the people in the dark, is that the crime wave is almost exclusively ‘Afro-Caribbean’ – blacks to you and me.

What am I not surprised? Well, because in the UK blacks are imprisoned at a rate of almost eight times that of whites. Representing it a different way, about 1.25 per cent of the entire black population of the UK are currently in jail, which probably means that about 2% of the black male population, and by extension, 7-8% of 16 -25 year old black males. So, what percentage of black males will go to jail at some point in their lives? 20%? 25%? 30%? If I may quote Colonel Kevin Myers: "We may presume that, for many black youths, imprisonment does not represent a delinquent departure from the norm, but the actual norm itself."

In fact if you check http://amren.com/colorofcrime/color.pdf (courtesy of Bert Rustle's Comment on this post) you'll find that the ratios are even less flattering to non-whites.

Similar ratios apply in the US and other countries that racially profile criminals. When we look at violent crime the figures are even more unflattering to blacks. And what about Africa itself? Most of the countries there are violent lawless hell-holes. Nigeria, despite vast oil wealth is a dystopian nightmare, a Mad Max land. The colonialism excuse has long passed is sell-by date – Africa’s citizens have achieved this largely by themselves. And in Ireland we sleepwalk into the same disaster England is now facing.

It’s too late for England.

That once green and pleasant land has now been deemed the worst place in the developed world for a child to grow up. Towns all over the country that were a joy to visit 30 years ago are now crime-ridden, racially segmented dumps. England has become a multicultural society, though it’s fair to say that few English people ever wanted it to be. Certainly they were never asked. Through the folly, arrogance and sentimentality of their well-insulated ruling class, and by their own inattention, disorganization and reluctance to appear unkind, the English have given up large tracts of their country to foreign peoples, whom they dislike and who dislike them right back. The English have created their very own race problem from scratch — possibly the greatest act of self-destructive folly perpetrated by any civilized nation in the twentieth century.


Can Ireland avoid the same? Your Savant doesn’t believe so, given our demonstrable genius for repeating the mistakes of other countries

Keep a straight face

Your Savant is almost inured by now to the outrageous, but even so a statement by one Mr. Patrick Quigley, who rejoices in the title of Chairman, Irish-Polish Society, takes the biscuit. Presumably quivering with suppressed mirth, he writes in the IT of Feb. 16 ‘Polish history offers a model of integration and toleration. There were no religious wars in Poland’, and wiping away the tears, adds Poland ‘opened its doors to Jews when they were persecuted elsewhere in Europe’.
Well, they certainly did open the doors of a very large barn to the Jews of Jedwabne in July 1941 - men, women and children. Only problem, they then locked the doors again and set light to the barn, killing hundreds in the process. Similar outrages occurred throughout Poland during WW2 with Nazi soldiers looked on appreciatively. In fact Poland has had, in common with all conservative Catholic countries, a rich seam of anti-Semitism which erupted regularly throughout their history. And ‘it hasn’t gone away, you know’.

To say the Church has been unhelpful would be, well, unhelpful. Priests regularly stoke up passions (you know, Christ-killers) without interference from the hierarchy. In October 1997, former Solidarity activist Father Henryk denounced the expected appointment of Bronisław Geremek to the post of foreign minister because of Geremek's Jewish heritage. Jankowski stated that there was no place for Jews in the Polish government. The priest has also denounced the Polish government's apology for the 1946 Kielce pogrom. "Apologizing to Jews is an insult to the Polish nation," he explained in a 28 July 1996 sermon. Quite. Such provocations didn’t stop Jankowski from subsequently thriving.

Cardinal Glemp refused to attend the Jedwabne 60th anniversary ceremony, explaining "I don't want politicians to tell the Church how it should express its sorrow for crimes committed by some group of its believers". That was the extent of the Church's expression of sympathy in regard to the Jedwabne pogrom (immortalised by Jan Gross in 'Neighbors'). In a country that is 90 percent Catholic, Church leaders don't even bother to put a spin on their position.

Now we have the gruesome twosome, the Kaczynski twins, who were elected to run Poland. (They, incidentally publicly oppose homosexuality despite being obvious benders themselves). They received much support from the most influential anti-Semitic propaganda machine in Poland today, Radio Maryja, which is run by a Catholic priest.

Chairman Quigley is certainly earning his crust with this kind of bombast.

Saturday, 10 February 2007

Too awful to be true?

Largely overlooked in the pandemonium that followed the 9/11 attacks were reports of a group of Arabs celebrating on the New Jersey waterfront after the first plane hit. This was assumed, understandably, to be just another example of the Islamic fifth column within the West, and soon faded from the mainstream media (MSM). Unreported in the MSM was the fact that the ‘Arabs’ were in fact Israelis, part of a group, presumably Mossad, that had been trailing various Al-Qaeda operatives in the US. Their cover was that of furniture removers, working for Urban Moving Systems Inc. – later shown to have been set up by Israeli ex-pats and which never did any normal ‘removing’. The owners fled back to Israel after the capture.

The FBI and CIA questioned the men for over 10 weeks, with the suspects placed in solitary confinement. However, following intensive pressure, the men were suddenly released back to Israel and the investigation shut down. Similar pressure ensured that the MSM dropped the issue like a hot cake, while various Congressional investigations similarly walked gingerly around it. Ironically, but not surprisingly, the story was brought to light by Jewish sources, specifically the eminent New York weekly The Forward, and the Israeli newspaper Ha’aretz, shaming once again the gutless US MSM.

So what was this all about? It all seems clear to your Savant (as is usually the case). A large Mossad team was shadowing various Al Qaeda operatives around the US, often residing within a couple of hundred yards of them. It seems certain that they picked up on the plans for 9/11. It’s equally certain that they passed on some information about the attacks to US intelligence, but not the precise nature and timings, celebrating when the first plane hit the WTC. We can make this assumption because everyone assumed that the first crash was an accident, although the subsequent events made clear that an organized attack was in progress.

Why would they do this? Well, because ostensibly the attacks were a godsend to Israel. Benjamin Netanyahu unwittingly acknowledged this, saying his gut reaction was that the events would be ‘very good’ for US-Israeli relations. Realising his error, he retracted and said, ‘not very good, but it’ll make Americans better understand the Israeli predicament’. According to David Margolian of the FBI, the detainees claimed that ‘America would now have to commit to fighting Islamic terrorism’. Check this site for some added background

It may appear horrific that the Israelis would deliberately let the attacks go ahead, but that state is in an existential fight for survival, and in the greater scheme of things probably see the 3,000 casualties as the lesser of evils. Equally, I'd sleep more easily in my bed if I felt that Mossad were tracking and eliminating the Islamo-fascists. However, the thing that should cause every right-thinking person to pause is the extent to which the MSM (which 99% of people rely on for their news), the FBI, CIA and the US Congress can all be brought to heel by a small but highly influential lobby group. Notwithstanding the Iraqi disaster, we can see the fingerprints of this group all over the war drums now hyping an attack on Iran.